The New England Classic
Reminiscing Alumnus Caught Alone In Alumni Stadium

“Dude, those were the glory days” Unny told the Classic. “I just love coming back to campus and this stadium and being reminded of how I was the literal man in my four epic years here. Plus, I’m an alumni. My name is literally on the building, so I’m gonna reminisce whenever I want, even if that’s every weeknight.”

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Ultimate Frisbee Teams Throw Pizzas Across Comm. Ave, Receive Crazy Dough’s Sponsorship

After getting the green light from the owner of Dough’s, Roni knew that she needed to get as many hands on deck as possible. She sent a text to Veggie Dude (CSOM ’22), captain of the Men’s Club Ultimate Frisbee team, to ask if his team could offer a few handlers. He was initially skeptical but eventually got on board. “I didn’t want to say yes at first because I knew I’d have a few beers in me, but then I remembered I play almost every club game drunk.”

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Strategic Genius: Boyfriend Utilizes Body Double to Deke Valentine’s Day Responsibilities

“Since he doesn’t have anything better to do, he’ll be the one forced to sit through Valentine’s Day dinner at the Dorchester Applebee’s while I’m watching Jerry York struggle to make it through one more year.”

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Circle Tavern “Edgar Allan Poe Night” Offers Chains, Wine, And Cement Special
THE CIRCLE TAVERN – Upperclassmen perusing Herrd last week were elated to see an advertisement from the Circle Tavern at the top of their page. Thursday’s “Chains, Wine, and Cement Special” drew students in with promises of giveaways, discounted appetizers, and a sampling of a rare drink known only... Read more
BC Marble Spillers And Banana Peelers Club Banned From Marathon
CARNEY HALL—While BC is renowned for uplifting and celebrating its student clubs, OSI has placed restrictions on the “Marble Spillers and Banana Peelers” club. From Sunday, 7 P.M. to Monday, 7 P.M., members of the club are not allowed within 20 feet of Commonwealth Avenue. “It’s a safety risk,”... Read more
10 Things I’d Rather Do Than Be At The Boston Logan International Airport
Live on CoRo all four years. I’d rather make the commute from exile every damn day than have to walk the marathon from the parking garage to the check-in desk even once.  Talk to Molly’s owner for longer than .2 seconds. I’d give that man my instagram handle- hell,... Read more
Student Vapers Decide To Play It Safe And Chain Smoke Cigarettes
RICHDALE FOOD SHOPS — After Governor Charlie Baker finalized the state-wide vape ban on Tuesday, Boston College Juulers announced their plans to take the “responsible course of action” and begin chain smoking cigarettes until electronic vaping devices are declared completely safe.  “I know exactly how horrible cigarettes are for... Read more
Embarrassing! Tom Brady Accidentally Kisses His Wife Instead Of His Kids
ATLANTA — In one of the most egregiously humiliating gaffes of the 21st century, Tom Brady kissed Giselle Bündchen, wife of almost 10 years, instead of his 12-year old son Jack on Sunday afternoon in the lead up to Super Bowl LIII. The Patriots quarterback reportedly kisses his son... Read more
Off-Campus Juniors Saved $183 In Heating Bill By Hosting Sweaty Parties
FOSTER STREET — After paying their most recent heating bill, the residents of 288 Foster St. have saved $183 this past December. Although Boston has been experiencing a winter with temperatures at record-breaking lows, the juniors maintained a comfortable, humid temperature in their home by hosting extremely sweaty parties... Read more
Mary Ann’s Reopens As Mary Jane’s

It is a disgrace, according to Tokin, that the only bar in the entire city of Boston is being replaced by another dispensary, and that harmless alcoholic drinks are being replaced by a dangerous, illegal substance.

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